Programming Humor

About my own code:

99 little bugs in the code 99 bugs in the code fix one bug, compile it again 100 little bugs in the code (goto start if bugs are greater than 1)

How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None – that’s a hardware problem

Why do programmers always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up?
Because DEC 25 = OCT 31

A doctor, a lawyer and a programmer are driving to a party together when the car breaks down. The lawyer says, “Let’s sue the automaker for making a crappy product.” The doctor replies, “Nah, let’s just pop the hood and see what’s wrong.” Confident he has the solution, the programmer announces, “Let’s get out of the car then get back in again.”

When Bill Gates died, he went up to Heaven, where Saint Peter showed him to his house; a beautiful 20-room house, with grounds and a tennis court. Bill Gates was pleased, and spent many months enjoying the amenities of Heaven.One day, he was enjoying one of Heaven’s many fine parks, when he ran into a man dressed in a fine tailored suit.

  "That is a nice suit, my friend," said Gates. "Where did you get it?" 
  "Actually," the man replied, "I was given a hundred of these when I got here. I've been treated really well. I got a mansion on a hill overlooking a beautiful hill, with a huge five-hundred acre estate, a golf course, and three Rolls Royces." 
  "Were you a Pope, or a doctor healing the sick?" asked Gates. 
  "No," said his new friend, "Actually, I was the captain of the Titanic." 
  Hearing this made Gates so angry that he immediately stalked off to find St. Peter. 
  Cornering Peter, he told him about the man he had just met, saying, "How could you give me a paltry new house, while you're showering new cars, a mansion, and fine suits on the Captain of the Titanic? 
  I invented the Windows operating system! Why does he deserve better?" 
  "Yes, but we use Windows," replied Peter, "and the Titanic only crashed once."

Basic for Noobs:

10 Start creating new software 20 Spend 3 weeks coding 30 Spend a further two months scratching head as to why the bloody thing doesn't work 40 GOTO 10

while true = true

Ah the time of the goto… line based redirecting is so 80s.

When I go to sleep, I watch some source code in dream and thinking. Normal dreams have disappeared. This is true story.

Read this book. It solves this problem. :wink:

Thank You! Rick. Coding is very addictive, isn’t it.

Depending on the person, ??? can be a bit more. :smiley:

Yes, ??? Wine Beer…
I make effort to take time play with or caring my dog. She is time keeper of my rest.

Indeed dogs are a programmers best friend - now if only she could help with the coding too!

Hi! Sam
Indeed, I agree with you. On more thing is daily good meals and good Conversation with my family and friends in real and Web.

This is how a daydream starts:

DIM getSleepy As Integer
FOR Y = 1 TO X
getSleepy = getSleepy + 1

I once worked worked somewhere where I sent out a “Daily Dilbert” email, went down a storm.

Error messages from a Zen operating system :